JULY TO MOURN

The title probably gives you an idea of  what im going to talk about in this post. Time is running too fast. It never waited anyone to catch up. It just keep going on and on and people leave. 

Well, last Sunday was a shock to me. It was a greatful morning woking up with a fully charged body and mind since i'm free from work. I was actually woke by a call from my mum. I picked up and talk awhile with her. She was asking about when Im going home and to bring back my grandma, then later on she brought up the news about my dog, Whiggie. She said they were sending him to the veterinarian on Friday due to his health issue, and Whiggie was not eating for a few days. She continued, saying that Whiggie had just passed away in the veterinarian clinic. I was literally stunned, and asked her whether she was being serious. I know Im calm but yet this had sadden me for the day. She said Whiggie's health can't be cure due to his age, and he would be better to free from the pain by injection. This is how they usually treat sicken old animal. To be frank, I hate this act but it probably the best we can do to cut down Whiggie's pain.

My mind started to refresh all my memories with Whiggie right after i hung up the call. From the 1st day he came to our family he was just a puppy with a tiny little body. Adorable faces, with super cute pose and hyper-active attitude that have brought happiness and fun to the Leongs. I was just a 15 naughty little boy, pretty close with Whiggie that time ( i bet im the closest one int he family). We had fun together going jogging, cycling and playing. He likes following me behind just in case he got lost. Hmm. a smart and obediant doggie. Still remember that he was once fell into the drain somewhere outside our house when he tried to cross over it. But he quickly went up and jumped all around the place again. Such a wonderful brave dog.

As i was growing up, i started to leave home more frequently, friends outing to go, club stuff, leaving home for college, and now university. I never know he grew old that fast and i sort of putting him aside like a stranger. I did regret that i have never spent more than 30mins with Whiggie again. I always wanted to but i didnt do it. Sometimes just because my health i couldnt be touching you for long. Everything is just too late. He is an old dog now, n he left us even without saying goodbye. I know he is now in heaven and I hope you know that I still love you, Whiggie. You are one of the best pet of our family, and may God bless your soul. We will always remember you.

Camille, me and my mei

Another terrible news is that my mei's sister,Camille Ong had just passed away last week due to brain stroke. I wasn't really know her well but we used to have dinner last May for my birthday. She was in comma for a week in GH, but she couldnt make it thru. She used to be my mei's closest sibling and I know it must be really painful to lose her. She is just 29years old. Hope God will bless her soul, and mei, hope that you can stay strong and pick up feelings fast. I'm sure that she will love to see you smile again and live well.

Life once again, proven to be fragile and weak. Hope you guys do express your love to your family and people you care about when they are still around you.
Loves.

第五集[大结局]

大学第五集告一段落了

来和你们分享一下过程
如果问说这一集的难度
我可以直接说是破表型的难
难在明白urban 的定义
难在设计urban infill 的四层建筑物
单是画plans 就花了几星期的时间
费了不少的脑细胞
对我而言，那是刻骨铭心的四个月旅程
作业总是扑满了时间表
看似只有四科要完成
自己似乎低估了它们
压得自己浑身伤痕累累

当然，那只占居了一部分

最辛苦的，还是自己不争气的身体
每天都来敲门的病魔
不断地在考验我的毅力
无止境测量着我的乐观能力
还记得每晚睡前的折磨
和掉了满地的头发
回想起来还是会为自己难过

再苦再痛
还是得完成手上的工作
不然这一切的坚持就会白费掉了
谢谢菩萨的垂怜
让一切都顺利完成
也让我遇到了新的专科医生
让我身体恢复了很多
体力和意志力都变好了


这学期除了这些以外
自己也尝试了半工读的滋味
帮帮建筑师们在职3D模型的工作
自己还蛮乐在其中的
只是有时会和作业相冲
或是多了夜睡的次数
不过得到汇报的那一刻
感觉还不乃哦

一如往常
还是要谢谢全部帮过我的人，关心我的人
九月即将是大学生涯的最终学期了
既期待又担心
但愿一切可以顺顺利利
然后就开怀毕业咯！

无可奈何

你是否曾经有那么一种感觉
在犹豫着你和某个人的关系
是对
还是错
是应该让它顺其自然
还是应该做个了段什么的

从认识到先在就要三年了
虽然没有名正言属的说你是我的谁
但大家似乎习惯了在身旁的彼此
习惯了一起走，吃，聊天，分享。
就那么单纯

自己曾有想过尝试往前踏一步
却发现缺乏了一种元素，那就是默契
可能是东马西马的环境差异导致的
而且奇怪的是，有时侯在功课上
觉得你总是让我的心情可以变得很糟
虽然往往是你无心的伤害
却让我觉得很痛苦
恨不得想呐喊的感觉
最后还是不忍心告知你
怕你会不开心

是你不够了解我
还是我不了解你
或是彼此应该学会问
学会深入了解
学会体会彼此要的是什么

靠
看来当下只能默默让一切走下去
毕竟也快毕业了

UPDATES ON JUNE '12

HI GUYS,

seriously i have left the blog untouched for a month. The last post was just a, some people call it SIP ZHOU LA in cantonese.

Well, the 1st thing i want to share is that, Im mentally healing now. I feel the revival of spirit, the feeling of getting pumped up is back. This is the good thing, well at least something is getting better it seem. I have to take, unfortunately, steroids to make this possible. Such a pathetic move to make something better, with something bad. I think u got what i mean do you?

Life was really really bad for the past few weeks. The feeling was terrible, the body was week, neither the mind was working like it should. Piles of work were done, submissions, sleepless nights, just like any other days from the previous semesters. I have stopped controlling my food range: so to speak im eating what i want to eat again. Haha! Probably i will change back to diet life when im having sem break, but for now, i think i need my favourite food to make me energized.

Back to the miserable feelings, i did mentioned i wanted to commit suicide just because i cant cope the illness anymore. N some part of my body has been destroyed physically just because of the illness. This have change the way i see myself. I think. I am not sure how others will put their eyes on me, but i hope things will be going better and better when the time goes on. However, steroid's side effects are my biggest concern at the moment.

I wanted to thank my mummy n daddy for putting their efforts on finding me a Cure. They had been trying endlessly, and i can see their tiredness too. I know how they feel on me. sincerely. I may be a burden to them, i will try making everything at its best. Thanks to friends that share my stress with me. U guys are always awesome.

Dear God, Thanks for making me feel better this week. I know u did hear my suffer and my pain. I pray once again, hoping for ur kindness to take away my skin illness. Amitabha.